Tired of dating
Our first and only in-person meeting was at a Middle Eastern restaurant — the Diplomat, in Monrovia — where over bites of pita bread, hummus and baba ghanouj, she inquired not only about my relationship history but also about family dynamics, including my parents’ marriage.
The first two matches were nice, but nothing clicked. She found him by engaging in some deep social-media digging.
As he later told me, she asked him many of the same questions she asked me — relationship history, family dynamics and more. Affairs columns He called a few days later, and we chatted for about 45 minutes. After, still weary of the dating near-misses and jaded, I worried that our instant connection could be attributed to the fact that he’s a native Angeleno, well trained in small talk in the land of shallow conversations. He brought me to the Last Bookstore on Spring Street, with a stop at a favorite mural: “Pope of Broadway,” featuring actor Anthony Quinn.
Having just turned 40, I knew that living 34 miles east of L. proper was a death sentence for love and dating: Not only was I out of the desirable age range for dating but I also lived far away enough in the ’burbs that I’d get dismissed even before I had a chance to impress and charm someone on a first coffee date. I hired the professional matchmaking service to help me find a potential life partner. You’re not looking for someone to ‘complete you’, right? ) Preferably, you’re looking for someone to enhance the wonderful life you’re already living. If the rest of your life is filled with things that make you happy and fulfilled, you’ll have a better attitude about dating. Next time you feel like staying home and binging on Netflix, turn off the computer or TV, get dressed, and leave your house. I no longer had to fret about optimizing my chances of meeting eligible bachelors.
A friend of mine likened it to hiring a real estate agent. People always ask me why I am still single, I get all the popular comments, like “Oh, that’s a shame, still single at your age”. There is nothing wrong with me, I’m athletic, been told I am attractive, outgoing, and I enjoy sports, and all sorts of out door activities, and have a great circle of friends, so why after all this time have I not met anyone? I’ve dated on and off for a few months to a year, only to have things crash and burn for one reason or another. I’ve tried the online dating, only to become seriously jaded by it all. I’m tired of friends telling me that when I least expect it, I will meet someone great, well, I have not been expecting it, and it never came. 🙁 Dear Lauren, I’m reminded of a story that Rich Gosse, the founder of American Singles, once shared with me.